


The Kids Aren't Alright

by asexualBasilisk, Kwiyomiboo



Category: South Park
Genre: I swear it's good, Lumpy Space Princess would be proud, M/M, Serious drama bomb, Sorry the summary kind of sucks, They're all college aged and are in college, This is kind of a college AU, We don't really talk about that though., but it works - Freeform, there's some drama
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-09
Updated: 2017-05-22
Packaged: 2018-10-29 19:20:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 20,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10860414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asexualBasilisk/pseuds/asexualBasilisk, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kwiyomiboo/pseuds/Kwiyomiboo
Summary: Craig Tucker left South Park to go take care of his grandparents. He came back for college, only to find his best friend and kind of ex-boyfriend dating someone else. He would be happy for Tweek, if this someone else wasn't a major dickwad. Really, he hated him with a passion but he had no idea what to do about it.Stan Marsh loved his life. He had an apartment with his two best friends, an amazing girlfriend, and he was captain of the football team. But, then he realized that he had more than friendly feelings for his super best friend, Kyle. It doesn't help that he was beginning to get jealous of blind dates Kyle went on due to his mother's requests.Kenny McCormick was scared of commitment, which is why he could easily be seen as a whore. But, he wanted to seriously date Butters. He just didn't want to be a shitty boyfriend, and he wasn't sure if he could be a good one so he didn't try to increase them to the next level. He was 99.99% sure that he loved Butters, but the thought of being involved for more than just a fling scared him.Romance is weird and hard, which is why this ragtag group of asshole friends have to work out their problems together. Suck on that, Friends (1994).





	1. There and Back Again, Old Feelings Bite you in the Ass (Creek)

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is a collaboration story thing. It will be many chapters and we will try to update every Monday. Hopefully, that gives you something to look forward to on the Hell that is known as Monday. Even though, "Monday would like for you to leave it alone. It is not its fault that you are emotionally unprepared for your professional lives. (Welcome To Night Vale)" Anyway, enough of this. Enjoy the story, fellow residers of the inter-webs. 
> 
> Before I forget: each chapter is going to be centered around a ship. The story is all in one piece yes, but each installment will focus on a different couple. For example, Chapter one is more Creek centric. Don't worry, the ship will be in the title if you're worried for some reason.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Craig come back to South Park, only to find that his caffeine addicted ex boyfriend, was dating someone else. Not only was it someone else, but it was the son of the one and only founder of Harbucks. To put the icing on the cake, he was in nicest terms: a dickwad. Craig hated his guts, but he knew that Tweek could do what he wanted- even if no one seemed found of the sack of shit. Tweek, however, is having old feelings for Craig emerge and he has no idea what to do. His life was controlled, yet Craig coming back threw everything out of the water. He found himself wanting more Craig and less Bryce, even though he should be wanting to spend as much time with his boyfriend as he possibly could. However, he was glad to have Craig back, that was for sure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has a fuckton of exposition. We're setting our scene in chapter one, my dear readers. You get to see what some of your favorite characters are doing with their lives in this work of fiction and how they turned out. Bonus points for anyone who get's where the title is from.

Four years. It's been a long four whole treacherous years since Craig Tucker had stepped on South Park soil. After getting out of his car he, for lack of a better word, admired just how shitty the small mountain town hadn't changed. How the neighborhood was still riddled with children playing, or how the streets weren't the least bit busy. He could've smiled at his peaceful never changing home town. But that just wouldn't be something he’d do.

“Craig!? Where are you going?” the lanky boy could hear his best friend, Clyde—kinda chubby, taco lover, dimples—calling out to him but pretty much chose to ignore him.

Token—suave, rich, good looking as hell—poked his head out of their shared apartment door. “I hope you know we're not unpacking your shit, lazy ass!” Once again Craig just ignored him and flipped them both off. Clyde looked at Token who just kinda shrugged. “He’ll be back.”

“Jimmy, you want tacos tonight?” Clyde went back in the house, dropping the subject. They all knew Craig just needed some time alone.

It had been a while since Craig walked these streets and even though he himself had changed he was witnessing first hand that everything else pretty much stayed the same. He found himself growing disgustingly nostalgic the more he walked around. The fact that the old elementary school building was still standing amazed him. The pond was still crystal clear as the day he left it. Everything was still there. It was like he was the virus that was invading. He was the odd one out. Given how weird this town is, being normal inherently made you strange. Craig grew up knowing this.

The icy blue eyed boy took out his small cheap camera he usually travels with and took snapshots of the serene scenery. Finally, like some sort of curse his feet just found the building he wanted to forget about all those years. He thumped his forehead realizing that his body automatically walked here because of all those years of conditioning and routine. A small coffee business located right in the middle of town. He took a picture of the sign before he peaked, a head of brown hair appearing in his view finder.

"Craig?"

Craig frowned. He wasn't ready to interact with anyone just yet. The moment he looked the man in the eyes it was like he hit resume on a game. Like all the puzzle pieces finally fit together. It was one thing seeing his old gang again but it was another when your ex-boyfriend’s dad is approaching you with a coffee stained smile and moon crescent eyes. The man had aged a bit, a few silver hairs here and there but he was still recognizable with his smooth commercial voice and sweater cladded body.

"Craig Tucker!" the man repeated, more enthusiastic this time as if he was 100% sure of it now. 

"Hello, Mr. Tweak...." Craig replied a bit hesitantly. The name feeling too weird to even utter. It had been far too long.

"Come! Come inside! Mrs. Tweak will definitely want to see you!" 

Craig wanted to decline but the hand leading him gave him no little to no choice. He gave up resistance. 

After entering the café he was attacked by the bitter sweet smell of fresh unground coffee beans. The green and brown themed shop, the exact same as he remembered it as a child. The same gathering of people. And the exact same amount of employees. Mrs. Tweak and the all too familiar Tweek Tweak, his ex-boyfriend. He couldn’t forget the fidgeting blond, with large hazel eyes that would always seem to bounce around the room. His hair was a mess and he was on the more petite side of things, with a slim build and a short height. But, that was just some of what gave Tweek a unique appearance. 

Tweek Tweak had been missing Craig each and everyday for the past four years. He really couldn’t help it, but eventually he had managed to adapt to not having him around. He still worked at his parent’s coffee shop, debatably doing the most work out of the whole family. He had grown up working there, and in turn always worked to his best for the shop. His father wanted him to take over the coffee shop one day, but Tweek just didn’t know if he would want to. Owning the shop would be a lot of pressure, and he wanted to be an actor. But then again, the chances of making it as an actor were never very high, especially for a self doubter such as Tweek. He had a life set up for him, and he could still keep acting as a hobby if he wanted. It would just be a lot safer to just take that route. He had friends here, and he wouldn't want his shop to be closed or taken over by someone who would simply run it into the ground. His life was okay, he was okay. 

He had a boyfriend, whom he had been dating for a little over a year. His name was Bryce and they moved in together 6 months into their relationship. Even though Kyle, who he was fairly good friends with nowadays, thought that it was a horrible idea. The redhead hated Bryce, really. He thought that he was too overbearing and just a generally shitty person. But, Tweek thought that Kyle didn't know what he was talking about. He was now an adult who made his own decisions. 

Tweek leaned forward slightly, cleaning the edge of a table with a damp rag. He was working on cleaning the tables before anymore customers could show up and dirty anything up again. The bell rang signifying a costumers entrance, which caused the automatic response of, “welcome to Tweek bros!” He then placed the rag in the center of the table, before bringing a hand up to adjust his headband, which he used daily to keep his wild hair out of his face during work. “How can we be of service…..” he instantly paused upon seeing Craig. He could recognize him anywhere, the look of Craig wasn't something he could easily forget. He was lanky and super tall, long somehow graceful limbs that made even sweats look like high fashion. He had rectangle like eyes with the longest darkest lashes Tweek had ever seen, encasing almost white icy blue eyes. The contrast always made him stand out. His mouth was forever made up in a permanent frown and he still adorned his blue chullo hat.

Tweek pinched himself, making sure that he wasn't dreaming. He only snapped out of it when his mom had went over to him and gave the boy an earful about how much he was missed, how lost everyone was without his antics, how every night after, Tweek would cry himself to slee- 

“Woah! Mom!” He was really desperate to get his mother to shut up, so he nearly jumped over that table, running to Craig and tackling him in a hug. "Craig! W-What are you doing here...?"

Craig stopped them from falling over, holding the petite blonde in his arms and feeling so weird about it. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Just his luck. The one person he wasn't ready to see just waltz up to him in a messy apron and a totally adorable headband. He realized he had been staring in silence for too long as everyone around them just stared at them anxiously, expecting something. Sighing, he tried to regain his cool.

"Hey, Tweaker, just thinking about a steaming cup of joe," Craig said monotonously letting a sly smirk play on his lips. But then his cool demeanor slipped and he shifted on his foot while placing a hand on the back of his head, scratching slowly. "I'm actually back in town for school....." 

There was a reason as to why Craig didn't want to see the jittery blonde. He couldn't hide his emotions around him and whenever he tried to hide behind a cool facade of indifference he found himself immediately spilling everything because he found it impossible to lie to the coffee addict. For this reason he found it hard to keep cool—a Tucker trademark— but, whenever Tweek was involved it became a different story.

Tweek pulled back from the hug, studying Craig's face. He did a mental comparison of the Craig standing in front of him and the Craig from his memories. He noted the small changes, the subtle stubbliness from manhood, the deeper voice, the absence of braces. However, overall he was still Craig. Still that galaxy nerd from their childhood. A huge grin spread across his face. 

He didn't really want to move away from Craig, he didn't think he was ready to. He finally had Craig back and he just wanted to spend every second he could with him- talking about old times, new times, good times, and bad times. But, instead of pulling him into a booth, he simply moved to stand behind the counter. He wrote 'Craig' on a cup. His father noticed that people liked when their names were written on the paper cups, so he adopted the habit for more business. He added two sugars into the dark liquid, exactly how he remembered making many times for Craig. He slid it across the counter with a smile, "w-well, I can take care of the coffee for you."

Suddenly, feeling much more calmer Craig accepted the brewed cup of caffeine and sipped. He smiled warmly, something he rarely does unless it's prompted by a Tweek Tweak. "Just the way I like it," he mumbled into the rim on the plastic cup. He could physically feel his heart swell but ignored the thundering in his chest to ask the boy a question. He looked around to see that his parents were back to work (Mrs. Tweak kept smiling and waving wanting to go up and hug him but also giving her son privacy). The traffic was also slow, only a few other regulars sitting and typing away on their computers.

"So...." Craig re-attempted his suave Token persona and leaned against the counter. "What have you been up to as of lately?"

Tweek poured himself his own cup of coffee, half caffeinated and half decaf. Bryce thought that the massive amount of caffeine made Tweek too jittery so he was trying to drink less of it. But, that was rather difficult while working in a shop where he was surrounded by the substance. He had spent so long drinking so much caffeine, stopping it had seemed to give him symptoms of withdrawal. 

He moved out from behind the counter, sitting in the booth in the back of the store. This booth was his booth. This was the booth where crazy stories were told, obnoxious laughter could be heard, and a rag-tag group of college kids would call their usual hangout. The only people who would sit there, were those who were unaware of the group’s existence. However, they never stayed for too long, gratefully. He motioned for Craig to sit down, "N-Not much, just living here- you know? Uh- what have y-you been doing?"

Craig took a seat but his eyes narrowed feeling like something was out of place. 

"Eh." he shrugged indifferently. "Boring, normal, average, you know all the good stuff." he responded with some sarcasm hidden in his smile. Though he wasn't lying. His family moved to Denver to help take care of his grandparents in their failing health. He loved his grandparents but the fast pace town was simple not the place for Craig. For as much shit he gives South Park, it's actually a reliable, somewhat safe place, and has a surprisingly great film production program (also read as affordable). 

He rested his head in his hand, scrutinizing every bit of the blonde. He still had a small stature, big clear eyes, pouty lips, sleepless bags. Even his hair still messy and all over the place. But, something was off. Craig didn't know what, but something was very off. He couldn’t shake the feeling, no matter how hard he tried. 

"Ah-hah!" It finally clicked. With everything being the same it would be weird if he didn't noticed. "You're hair is a bit longer than before isn't it! And you changed your cologne..." Craig sniffed the air. "It smells....nice..." Craig didn't really like the change. There was something off about how it coated his natural smell of cocoa and cleanliness he loved. In fact he smelled like someone entirely different. 

Tweek listened intently to Craig, nodding while he spoke. He knew that he was in Denver. It was a distance that wasn't that far away when looked at on a map, but it was able to feel far away enough to be in a different universe. Especially if Craig rarely visited. The whole situation of Craig being back was still just slightly surreal for the blonde. He tapped his fingers on the table, eyes darting around in their normal fashion. He had started wearing cologne, since Bryce liked the way it smelled. He was indifferent to the smell, really. 

 

Craig cocked an eyebrow. He knew something was bothering the fair haired boy and he needed to know why. "Tweek-"

"TWEEK!" 

Craig scrounged up his face. He diverted his attention to the brown haired, slick back, well-dressed man standing at the front of the store. He looked like some rich bastard’s son. A character Craig was completely unfamiliar with but already knew he couldn't like him just by the douchey vibe he gave off. 

He walked over to them with a completely pissed off aura.

Tweek jumped at the shout of his name, letting out a squeak of surprise, “o-oh, Jesus!" . He frowned when he heard the all-too-familiar angry tone lacing the voice of his boyfriend. He hunched slightly and cradled his coffee cup. He really did not want to deal with Bryce right now, he just wanted to sit and talk to Craig. He knew he shouldn’t feel like that, but he hadn’t seen Craig in so long that he couldn’t help it. He wondered briefly if he could duck under the table and not be seen, only to dismiss the thought since he should be happy to see his boyfriend.

"Babe, you forgot that we were supposed to have brunch with my mom! I had to lie to her and tell her you were sick. Next time, when you have to decide between my family and your shitty coffee shop remember I'm dating your sorry ass!" Bryce growled. 

Craig didn't like the way this new guy was talking to his Tweek. It also didn't feel right that the bastard claimed to be dating Tweek. It made his skin crawl. He knew that he and Tweek were broken up or to be truthful, they were never really dating in the first place. Sure, the town loved to see them hold hands and play video games but that was just them hanging out like normal. Tweek was never his to begins with.

But that didn't matter right now. This guy was pissing him off. So he gave him a Tucker family greeting.

He flipped him off.

"What the fuck, braw?! What's your deal? Babe, who the fuck is this asshole?!" the preppy boy ignored Craig completely and turned to Tweek with a deep scowl.

Tweek shrunk under Bryce's growl, scooting farther into the booth. He wanted to say that he actually had responsibilities and couldn't just sit around all day and leach off of his father's bank account. Instead, he just nodded. "N-Next time, I'll try and get s-some time off!" 

He hated when Bryce got angry with him. He dragged a hand through his hair, tugging on the locks slightly. He really didn't want Bryce and Craig to meet like this, at all. He definitely knew that Bryce wouldn't take the flip off well, it was not off to a great start. 

He let out a stressed noise, before dragging his hands down his face and taking a desperate sip of coffee. "B-Bryce, this is Craig. Craig, this is my b-boyfriend, Bryce." 

Boyfriend. 

Craig never knew he could hate a word so much. A word that sounded so wrong, so vile, he wished it never existed. His glare faltered when he saw the brunette's confident smug smile. He just wanted to punch it off his stupid face. But he could just show up out of nowhere and make a scene. He sat back and ignored the both of them opting to look out the window. He needed to stay indifferent. Be indifferent. Mind his own business.

"Well, you better or else we are finished and I'll tell everyone in town you've been cheating on me." Bryce threatened fully prepared to ruin Tweek's reputation. 

Craig's fingernails dug into the table. Be indifferent, Craig. Stay calm. Like always.

Tweek's eyes widened at the threat, frantically turning to look at him. "B-But you can't do that! I-I've never cheated on y-you!" Tweek had been faithful throughout their whole relationship, he had a strong hatred against cheating. Bryce on the other hand had cheated on Tweek a little over 4 months ago. He had apologized and Tweek had forgiven him, even though his friends had all wanted him to break up with Bryce then and there. He wouldn't mention it, since he knew that Bryce would just accuse him of being petty. 

He really didn't want Craig to see them when they were like this. It was more of something he would like to keep to himself. He didn't want anyone to worry about him, or get mad at Bryce. People always seemed to think that it was worse than it was when they saw the pair in a fight. 

"Tch. Then who's this guy huh? You know what forget it." Bryce dropped it seeing as there were a lot of people looking at them now. "Tonight I want you and your parents to come over and have dinner with my folks. My dad's business partners are going to be there. Don't be late." he said that last line threateningly. 

"B-But he's a friend!" He squeaked out, before covering his mouth. He drank more of his coffee, wishing to whatever god there might be, that it had more caffeine in it. "I-I'll be there." He sighed as he walked away, resting his head on the table and groaning. Bryce walked over to Tweek's parents and became a completely different person. He was super nice to them and politely let them know they were invited to his house for dinner. Craig watched as the Tweaks smiled and laughed becoming completely charmed by his act. It made Craig sick to his stomach. His parents loved Bryce, they wanted Tweek and Bryce to tie the knot and he knew it. He didn't know if he was ready for that. He was tired, but he was holding onto hope that maybe Bryce would snap out of it and they could go back to being the loving couple they were at the start of their relationship. 

He looked at Tweek seeing how down he was from how that guy treated him and got even more pissed. No one should be able to treat Tweek like that and get away with it, it was absurd. 

Fuck being indifferent.

He jumped up and pulled Tweek up by his wrist.

"Come on. Let's get out of here."

Tweek felt a hand on his wrist, then he felt himself being tugged out of the booth. With his free hand, he made a ‘one second’ gesture before running off to hand up his apron. He rushed back to Craig, giving an apologetic smile, "I-I'm sorry about him."

"Don't talk about him." Craig was angry. Craig never gets angry. But he just couldn't control himself when he saw how sad Tweak looked just now. The last thing he wanted to do was think about the smug face of the asshole. They walked pass Bryce and right out the door. Craig took Tweek's small hand, simply walking with him and staying silent. Tweek intertwined their fingers, squeezing Craig's hand slightly. He really missed being able to walk around with Craig, hand in hand without a care. Even after all these years, Craig's hand still seemed to fit perfectly in his own hand. He gave a small smile to their hands, before looking around while they walked. He trusted Craig, he would trust Craig with his life if it came down to it. He knew that the noirette wouldn't do anything that would end in trouble. 

Craig knew exactly the place to make Tweek feel better. A place Kenny showed him years ago. 

Out on the abandoned side of town in sodosopa was an untouched building. A hidden gem uncovered by anyone else. He took Tweek to the roof.

"Perfect the sun is setting!" he smiled presenting the view. 

Arguably it was the best view in town, showing the hidden beauty of South Park. From the pond, to the “downtown” area, to the neighborhoods. The view was magnificent and special. Craig wondered why he never showed Tweek this place before.

The coffee addict looked around when they got to the roof, before smiling brightly and letting out a laugh of pure joy. It was finally getting to him: he was here with Craig, looking at a view that could never be rivaled. He was truly, wonderfully happy. It's been awhile since he's felt this great, really. Of course, he was happy when he was with his friends in the familiarity of the corner booth in his shop. But Craig was a different happy, he was the unpredictable happy that made you feel like the moment would never end. It made him forget about his problems, Bryce, his studies, his job, and any other issue.

Craig smiled to himself while looking at Tweek. He felt like he actually accomplished something looking at his calm smile. He noticed how he wasn't as jittery as usual and the way his hazel/green eyes shone when the sun hit them. His small face and pointy nose and large doey eyes. He never realized how much he missed just being with Tweek and the fact that he is back standing right next to him just didn't feel right.

At the end of middle school, they broke up mainly because Craig had to move away and partly because neither of them were sure they could keep up the facade. 

Sure they kept in contact but that was easier said than done. Craig dropped his phone into the ocean on a family trip and he just forgot to get Tweek's number again. 

Yet, here they were. Talking as if it was normal. As if Craig and Tweek were always meant to be.

The wind blew gently tousling their hair and turning chilling with lost of the sun's heat. Craig placed his hands in his pocket in response to the chill but kept his eyes on the small blonde just enjoying his company. 

"You know...I kinda....no, I missed you." Craig said with as little sarcasm as he could. He wasn't trying to be a dick it was just the way he sounded naturally.

Before Craig had left, Tweek was one of the only people who could truly be able to tell what he was feeling. Here he was, sitting with the person he thought he might never see again on an abandoned roof with the sun setting beautifully above them, and he could still find out when he was being serious. Most people thought he was just a monotonous dick, but Tweek knew he was so much more than that. There was so much that could only be described as Craig, and each thing was as important as the rest. He hated not being able to see or talk to Craig, but he didn't expect everything to go back to normal immediately. Yet, it seemed like it had and he couldn't be happier. 

He sat on the ground, before laying out and stretching his arms out next to him. He closed his eyes for a moment, before opening them. "I missed you too- a lot. R-Really."

"Aww ho-how romantic!" Craig's eyes widened as he turned around and saw two blondes with wide knowing smiles on their faces. 

"Shit." Craig mumbled under his breath. Of course, leave it to the meddling duo to ruin a good moment. 

"Hiya Craig! Hiya Tweek!" Butters giggled gleefully. Craig remembers him exactly how he was too. His big dopey heart smile, his chubby cheeks, and how he resembled a small baby animal. 

But here he was hand in hand with Kenny McCormick. He was the same as well, dusty blonde hair, lankiest kid he's ever seen, and peppered with freckles. This was something fairly new. He knew they were friends but he didn't know they were this close. 

 

Tweek jumped when he heard Kenny and Butters, before relaxing when he saw that it was just them. He had grown closer to the strange pair, they were actually pretty close friends. "H-hey, guys- Craig's back!" He chuckled, sitting up. 

 

"Hey, Butters, hey McWhoremick," Craig greeted flipping the both of them off but in a nice way. Like a greeting he would give close friends he hadn't seen in awhile.

Kenny grinned, before jumping and punching the air with the hand that wasn't holding Butters' hand. He couldn't help that he was excitable, that's just how he was, always had been, and always would be. In short terms, it was a Kenny thing. Plus, he thought it was pretty fucking great that Craig was back. "Holy shit, dude. You still look as horrible as you did when you left! Debatably, worse. I didn’t think that you could get worse, but you did it- and I’m so proud of you." Kenny and Craig had a friendship made out of insults. Neither of them meant it, and they never seriously offended each other. Besides, everyone knew Kenny was a whore, it was common knowledge. But he was a lovable whore, who may or may not have slight commitment issues. The thought of commitment kind of scared him, to be honest. He never thought he could have a real relationship, then Butters showed up and he wanted one but didn't know how to have one. 

Tweek rolled his eyes at Kenny, before standing up and wiping the dirt off of himself. He wasn't going to deny the comment about it being romantic. There was really no point in it. 

"it's been so long since I've seen ya'll together li-like this!" Butters noted shooting Tweek a knowing glance. He bit back a smile. Mouthing towards Tweek. "Good for you, man."

Since Tweek couldn't go home when he needed away from his own apartment, he would end up at Butters'. Butters just had an aura which made you spill your guts to him, and most likely not regret it. Tweek quickly shook his head, "gah! No- we're not back together!" even if he wanted to be, they weren't. He was with Bryce, and Craig might not even be interested in him anymore. 

Craig furrowed his eyebrows. He was just trying to keep it peaceful but ends up being surrounded by the local riff-raff. Though, he couldn't say he didn't miss it. 

He went over and fist bumped Kenny. "Good to see you too, dude."

Kenny fist bumped, before pulling Craig into a hug. "Yeah, yeah. I know. I'm pretty great to look at," he joked. 

"Don't ruin the moment McCormick," Craig rolled his eyes. 

Basically everyone in the friend group hated Bryce. Along with him being a horrible boyfriend, he had done something to offend each and every one of them at some point or another. He would love to kick his ass, so naturally he got an idea. He grinned, before mumbling so no one but Craig could hear. "You, me, team up and kick a bitch's ass."

Craig leaned in listening to Kenny's proposition. "Sounds good. But I'm thinking about kicking this bitch's ass by myself." Craig smirked confidently.

He looked over to see Butter and Tweek whispering in a deep conversation. 

"Plus, there's a pretty great guy that's dating him and I don't wanna ruin my friendship with him if you know what I mean?" The dark haired boy watched them talk and laugh and found his stomach doing flips whenever he heard Tweek's melodic laughter. Craig looked back at Kenny. "You got a cancer stick?" he quit smoking a while ago but for some reason he really wanted a cigarette.

"Oh no, I want in. You're not doing this without me." Kenny rolled his eyes, whispering before pulling back and patting his back. He reached into the pocket of his old parka, before pulling out a carton of cigarettes. "You're lucky I always keep some on me." He never quit smoking, even though he should. He pulled two of the sticks out of the box, before pulling out a lighter and lighting both. 

Kenny watched Butters and Tweek, a smile on his lips as he watched Butters. Butters was usually happy and smiling, but damn it- Kenny could stare if he wanted to. The sight was always breathtaking.

Tweek chuckled at something Butters said, simply enjoying the time he had with his friends. He knew he wasn't the only one to miss Craig, so he was fine with letting him and Kenny catch up- even if they were interrupted.

"Fine. Thanks," Craig took the lit stick and placed it to his lips, blowing smoke into the now night air. "How's everything been....I mean how's Tweek been?" Craig knew he should ask the boy himself but he didn't want to bring up that asshole around him. He also couldn’t be sure if Tweek’s answer would be 100% accurate. He trusted Tweek, but it was always better to ask a more objective source. "I mean when did the whole Bryce thing start?" he tried to think back to when they would talk. Back to when they would talk everyday. Not once did he mention Bryce. So was it recent? How did they even get together? Why would Tweek even go for a guy like that?

Kenny knew the questions would come, and he was ready to give the whole truth. He honestly wished that Tweek would dump Bryce and get back with Craig, or even just dump Bryce. He wanted Bryce gone, for Tweek’s better interest. Besides, Craig and Tweek were fucking adorable together. There was also the fact that everyone here had already played all of their cards, maybe Craig was the key in getting Bryce to properly fuck off. 

He took a puff of the stick, breathing out slowly. "Started dating about a year ago, moved in together 6 months ago. Kyle thought it was a horrible idea, he even cleared out a room in our place- but Tweek insisted he wanted to go with Bryce. I can't tell you why they started dating, I can't even stand the asshole. He thinks he's better than everyone and treats Tweek like he's property or some shit. The kicker is that his daddy is the founder of Harbucks. The kid's loaded beyond belief."

"Fuck." Craig took a drag of his cigarette. "Does Tweek know about this?" The taller couldn't help but get pissed off thinking Tweek was being taken for granted.

Kenny simply nodded, "all the Tweaks know. Yet, his parents love him to bits. He's repulsive, he's honestly kind of worse than Cartman in a way. I did not think that was possible- but at least Cartman has some small shred of decency in him." He breathed in the cigarette again, breathing out smoke into the night air. "Literally the first time we met, he called me 'the help.' He's constantly looking down on me since I'm poor- you know? I’m totally used to that- but that fucker's probably never had a real job in his life and treats his boyfriend like shit but I'm over here balancing 3 jobs and school to keep food on the table and pay rent for people I don’t even live with anymore. Plus, I actually want my little sister to have a chance at a good life."

Craig sighed heavily. This Bryce guy was becoming more and more of an unlikable dick by the second. He knew Kenny wasn't poor by choice and the fact that he owns up to himself and makes sure to take care of his sister while going to school is something Craig found amazing. He certainly couldn't do it.

 

He got up and dusted off his pants finishing his cigarette and stomping it out.

"Come on, I gotta get to Token's place, I'm not done moving in." He turned and called out the others who were having some riveting conversation alone. He kind of wondered what they were talking about so secretively.

Kenny finished his cig, before stomping it out as well. Before the others could hear what they were talking about, he quickly added, "I know I'm not that serious most of the time. But you're needed here right now, we've all played our cards but Tweek's still with Bryce. I'm worried that he's just going to get worse over time." He pat Craig's shoulder, before skipping over to Butters and wrapping his arms around his waist. 

Tweek had been discussing Craig coming back and Bryce with Butters, not sure what to do in the current situation. He stood up when Craig called out, shooting another smile to Craig.

"Hehe..." Butters giggled. "Yeah, it's getting kinda late....let's go home Ken and...." Butters looked at the other two staring at him. He blushed madly. "M-make cookies!" he blurted out louder than needed. They all laughed at his shyness.

“It's okay, Butters we’re all adults here, we all….make cookies,” Craig winked making Butters blush madly and slap Kenny’s shoulders for laughing.

"Oh hey! Tucker is back!" Craig sighed. It was like he was running into all the wrong people. 

Stan Marsh. 

The good looking all-American dream boat. Tall, built, and tan. Even Craig had to admit the boy's perfect smile pissed him off in the nicest of ways.

"You’re shitting me. You guys live in the same building as Token?" Craig sounded completely enthusiastic....not. "Well, I guess I can count on you for if I needed sugar, candy ass." Craig snorted at his own joke.

Tweek had gone home so he could get ready for his dinner with Bryce and his parents. He would have rather stayed with Craig, but he knew that he really couldn't. He made sure to trade numbers with Craig before he left, of course. Craig felt a little twinge of jealousy hit him when Tweek decided to leave but he just decided to leave it be. For today. He was serious about taking up Kenny's offer and at least scaring the douche into treating Tweek better.

Kyle has always felt slightly strange standing next to Stan after they had both finished growing. He loved his best friend to pieces, but it was slightly unnerving to always being next to the embodiment of male perfection. He was definitely shorter and paler than Stan, paired with softer features and wild hair. But, that's how it's always been so he was able to completely ignore it. Almost. 

Kyle moved to stand next to Stan, ruffling his own hair slightly. The pair had gone out to pick up a few quick things from the store, since they were slightly low on them in the apartment. His green eyes widened when he saw Craig, before giving a smile and a wave. "You know, most people think that the point of leaving South Park is to never come back. Truly, you're an outlier, Craig."

Craig watched, unamused, as Stan and Kyle walked up to them. Stan was holding most of the bags not because Kyle was weak or anything (he was sure Kyle could kick his ass to be truthful) he just felt like being a gentleman. 

"So what drags the cat back in?" Stan smirked making Craig's stomach churn. It was some irrational hatred toward the clean cut boy. 

Maybe it was the fact that they both looked similar and would get compared. Or the fact that Stan almost always attracted the weirdest of shit to happen to them. Either way, Craig just ignored him and answered Kyle. He liked him way better.

"Hey, Kyle," Craig emphasized shooting Stan an unwarranted glare. The blue eyed teen was so used to it—he didn't even blink. "And yeah, I'm a special kind of breed. Plus, there's some things I left behind that I should've finished...." Craig trailed off looking into the distance. 

Butters threw a thoughtful glance towards Kenny. 

Kenny looked back at Butters, before wrapping an arm around his shoulders and using his shoulder to rest his chin. He hummed slightly, "I kind of go back and forth from their," he motioned to Kyle and Stan, "apartment to Butters. It depends on the day, really."

Kyle gave a chuckle, glancing between Stan and Craig. He knew that the pair didn't like each other, hell everyone knew they didn't like each other. But, he was used to it. He knew if a fight did break out, he could get Stan under control enough to stop it. He adjusted his grip on the bag he was holding, Stan could hold the rest. Kyle didn't ask him too, and Stan always naturally did it. Kyle nodded at Craig, "well- welcome back. We're in apartment 2B by the way. If you ever want to stop by. Which, you should stop by later- I think we should bring you up to date on everything." He could already see the beginnings of a plan forming in his head. With Craig here, getting Bryce to fuck off seemed a lot easier. 

"Well, okay, sounds like a plan. But for now I'm gonna go hit the hay. I rather not look at Marsh's ugly mug longer than I have to." Stan rolled his eyes. "I'll catch up with you guys later," Craig saluted walking to his new apartment in 1A. 

Technically, it was Token's apartment, Jimmy also lived there and Clyde mooched off Token and Jimmy and they needed a third income. So, naturally, Craig offered to pay rent. 

He entered the oddly clean apartment to find his stuff still at the front door. Of course his friends wouldn't unpack for him. He looked down to see a note most likely from Clyde. 

'Were not your slaves lazy ass!'

Which was finished off with some badly drawn Craig with a huge booger and a penis on his forehead.

Craig chuckled at the childishness. Oh how he missed them. 

It must've been too late because it seemed everyone was sleep. He shrugged he knew he had plenty of time to catch up with them. So, he opted to postpone his responsibilities a little longer (he was still tired from all  
the new information from today) and went to his room. 

"Hey Dot," Craig greeted his guinea pig. Unfortunately, Stripe (read as reason #2 for living) died a few years ago. But luckily not before having some offspring. A little girl Craig kept and named Dot after the little dot of color on her back. Flinging himself on the mattress, he pulled out his phone and scrolled through his contact list. 

Stopping at the new number he realized he didn't get a picture of the blonde for his profile pic.

To Coffee Bean: Hey, I need a pic of you. When will you be free next?

 

Tweek had gotten home, closing the door behind him and making sure that it was locked. It was a habit of his. He went back to the bedroom, only to walk through the room to stand in the master bathroom. It was a nice apartment, with a fair amount room and minimal cracks, it wasn't messy but it wasn't exactly clean. Whenever Tweek would clean, Bryce would come in and just mess it up again, it was a cycle of mess. 

He tried to tame his hair, Bryce's parents were the type of people who you needed to dress to impress for. After giving up, he changed out of his work uniform into something nice. He really didn't want to be seen as a sloppy boyfriend. 

Finally, finished getting ready but dreading living through the predictably disastrous dinner. His parents were judging and he just wanted to get home. He smiled softly when he saw Craig's message, before sending a quick photo he had taken a few weeks prior.

"Babe, are you ready to go?" Bryce stuck his head into their shared room. He strides up to the smaller boy looking him over. "Babe, you been eating a lot? No offense You look a little fat around the waist." he said examining Tweek closely and even pinching at the barely there love handles. "Maybe you should diet. Can't have you letting yourself go already!" the brunette chuckled.

Tweek frowned, looking down at himself. He didn't think he was getting fat, his shirts still fit him the same. They were baggier if anything. "I-I don't think I've been eating more than usual." He mumbled slightly, before pulling his shirt tighter around himself to inspect his shape. He didn't see any extra weight. "I don't think I need to diet."

 

"Hah, stay in denial babe just saying you'll be getting less food, but for now let's get to my parents' house were late." Bryce completely ignored Tweek’s feelings and ushered him out and into the car. Tweek frowned, before following Bryce and getting in the passenger seat. He never really drove anywhere, since driving gave him worse anxiety than he already had. 

 

Meanwhile, Craig responds back with a simple text. 

To Coffee Bean: Gorgeous.

 

Tweek looked back down at his phone, quickly texting back with a smile spreading across his cheeks, 

To Spaceman Craig (Kenny chose the name not Tweek): I need a photo of you too, you know.

Craig had just got out the shower when he checked his phone and paused. He smiled at the utterly adorable picture of Tweek. Shit, he doesn't have a picture of himself. At least a half decent one decent one. He then smirked and thought of something even better.

Moments later he sent Tweek a picture of him practically naked from the torso up, hair still damp and a towel wrapped around his waist. Snickering, he figured the unsuspecting blonde was malfunctioning right about now.

 

Tweek was scrolling through his phone when he got the image. He opened the message, before his eyes widened. He squeaked out an, "oh, Jesus!" He then kicked his legs out of surprise, phone flying out of his hands, only to hit the back of the back seat before falling into the seat part.

"What? You okay there, babe?" Bryce raise one eyebrow. He backed out and started driving towards his parents house.

"I'm fine!" He quickly exclaimed, calming himself down and reaching back to grab his phone. He saved the photo, making it Craig's contact photo with a slight blush on his cheeks. He locked his phone, resting it in his lap. 

He looked out the window, tapping his fingers on his knee. He hated Bryce's family, he felt like he just didn't belong there. They were all rich, and he spent his time studying or working.

There, like he expected, Bryce’s parents only talked down to him. His own parents were so far up their butts they just agreed. Tweek just sighed.

He already missed Craig.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This concludes our first chapter. Our next chapter will have a lot of Stan and Kyle. It's filled with drama, suspense, and basketball.


	2. The Death of a Bachelor (Style)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stan and Kyle thought they had everything figured out. They were roommates, super best friends, and inseparable. Stan had a girlfriend, and Kyle was practically in a relationship with his studies. Yet, things didn't seem right. It felt like there was something missing between them, some unspoken thing. An unspoken thing that could potentially be a time bomb, or it could make everything perfect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to Hell, part two. As in Chapter two. It's here, on a Monday. I told you it would be a Monday. Read this if you want, I won't force you to read it. You could always just put your device down, walk backwards out of your room, go socialize. Say hello to your mother, I'm sure she misses you. Or your father, if you want. Perhaps a family pet who hasn't seen you in a while? Maybe you've been in your room reading stories on this sight for hours on end? Or maybe this is the first story you've opened? Either way, here is the second chapter.

Stan Marsh had a perfect life. He's was captain of the football team at his college, president of the Save The Whales Cub, has a smoking hot girlfriend, and a sweet apartment he shares with his super best friend in the whole world. Nothing to complain about.

Except. 

That small nagging feeling at the back of his head when he heard the news of Kyle going on blind dates.

He felt childish. Like, he knew he shouldn't feel this way but he just couldn't help it. They were old enough now. The thought they both carried in their minds that this wasn't going to be forever was becoming their reality. A time will come where Stan and Kyle must split up. But Stan still feels that Kyle can't get a girlfriend, then he won't have time for him. And what's a Stan without the red headed Jewfro that was always by his side? It was too weird to even think of, to even entertain the idea of. Yeah, that's definitely the reason why. Not because Stan feels jealous or anything. Stan was completely content with how his life was going and he wanted it to stay 100% the same. Kyle getting a serious girlfriend would just get in the way of that.

Kyle was happy, he was more than content with his life. He was finally able to control his own life, he didn’t have to worry about what anyone thought. He was free from his parents and couldn’t get pushed around anymore. Then, of course, his mom had to find a way to ruin it yet again. They hadn’t been on the best terms as of late, since they had taken their time getting over the fact that Kyle was never going to go to law school and in turn become a lawyer. As soon as they were back in contact, his mother started planning the dreaded dates. He wasn't even interested in dating a girl, yet he couldn’t get away from them. His mother just wouldn’t listen. 

He was only slightly jealous of Stan's girlfriend. Slightly. Not because he wanted to date Stan, that would just be absurd. Even if he did think about dating him every once in awhile, they were obviously just friends- super best friends. He just didn't like their time being interrupted by his girlfriend, that was obviously the issue. The thing they had was special. Way more than what Stan had with Wendy. Wendy knew what he ordered because he got the same thing but if Stan ever wanted anything new Kyle would know without having to even ask. After being super best friends all your life you gain those kinds of powers. Not on again/off again flimsy girlfriends. But Kyle’s not jealous. 

Kyle slugged into the apartment, flopping on the couch. The last date had taken a lot out of him, he just wanted to get home the whole time. He took off his tie, lamely throwing it around the room, before working on getting the product out of his hair. He tried to look nice for the date, even if it made him feel like a douchebag. "Do you think my mom would believe me if I told her I died and moved to Canada?"

"Pfft," Stan chortled from the one of the high raised chairs at the kitchen island. "Ky, this is your mom we're talking about as if you could escape her. Even in death!" Stan replied eyes still examining their water bill. Just what the hell was Kenny doing with all those long showers....Stan sighed pinching the bridge of his nose. He didn't want to think of that anymore. 

 

"You're right. If I died without telling her first, she would march into the afterlife and drag me out by my ear." He laughed, before rubbing his eyes. He had nothing in common with his date, and she would not give him two seconds to just take a break from her. It really drove him crazy.

 

Getting up, the tall boy sauntered over to the tuckered out red head and softly flung his whole weight on top of him. "What do you say we ditch your next date and go for some coffee?"

Kyle chuckled at the blue eyed boy, before giving him a pat on the shoulder. "That would be amazing. My mom is convinced that I'm going to love the next one which means I'm probably going to hate her."

Stan frowned but Kyle couldn't see that. He wanted to be supportive of this whole dating thing. He really did, he knew deep down that Kyle deserved to be in a relationship with someone that loves him. However, the idea of Kyle soon to be taken away from him just made his stomach do flips. Standing up he tore off his shirt, unashamed of his body. He was a student athlete so he knew his figure was more than good. He went over to the bathroom to freshen up and then to his room to throw on a clean shirt. 

Kyle should be used to seeing shirtless males in his apartment, since neither Stan nor Kenny wear shirts too often when they're walking around. He was really the only one who had modesty out of the trio. However, he couldn't help the faint pink tint on his cheeks when Stan ripped off his shirt. Trying to avoid it, he simply looked down at his phone and scrolled through his feed. Stan was his best friend, he shouldn’t be looking at him like that. Even if he was hot.

After he got ready, he went back and leaned over the smaller boy. "Are you going to get ready or do I have to rip you out of that suit?" he questioned with a slightly raised eyebrow and a smirk playing on his stupidly perfect lips. He enjoyed teasing the Kosher boy, his reactions were usually hilarious.

Upon Stan leaning over him, Kyle nearly jumped over the back of the couch and came dangerously close to kicking Stan in the crotch, due to him being surprised. He couldn’t control what he did when he surprised, if anything happened it obviously would be Stan’s fault. 

"Woah!" Stan stepped back when Kyle's sole came dangerously close to his precious.

Kyle slid underneath Stan's arm, so he could get off of the couch. "I think I can undress myself, maybe later though?" Kyle threw the comment over his shoulder, sly green eyes meeting Stan’s own. The tan male gulped quietly, his palms growing slightly sweaty. Was it hot in here? Kyle smirked satisfied at the reaction, could tease right back at full force, if he needed to.

Stan threw his hands up in mock surrender and watched the boy get up to go get ready. Smiling to himself. 

Kyle had simply grabbed the first semi-matching outfit he could find, before throwing it on and leaving. He couldn't care less how he was dressed, to be truthful. 

Once Kyle finished, they left the apartment. Stan decided they should just walk and leave the car. People rarely drove because the town was pretty small and cozy and you could get to most places in under fifteen minutes anyway. With Tweek bros. being in the center of town, it only took them ten minutes tops.

 

Kyle enjoyed the walk with Stan. He always did enjoy when they would walk together, really. The town would seem so peaceful, and overall just wash him over with a wave of familiarity. He wasn’t always overly fond of the town, yet he enjoyed it when Stan was there to make it seem perfect. Stan seemed to almost have a superpower which would make everything better for Kyle.

The doorbell chimed alerting the employees of a new customer.

"H-hey there, fellas!" the first thing they were greeted with was Butters leaning against the counter, a bright flowery smile on his face. Some days, he liked to help Tweek out whenever he knew his parents would be off doing business elsewhere and would leave him to fend for himself. He adorned the green apron essential to the uniform and a broom held firmly in his hand. 

 

Kyle gave a smile and a wave to Butters, having been used to seeing him working the shop even though he didn’t have an official job, or get paid really. He was there to help his friend, and he was happy to do it. 

Butters turned to the back and called out, "Hey Tweek, your parents are here!" 

Stan laughed a bit. Him and Kyle were pretty protective over Tweek. Even more than his real parents were. Leaning over to Kyle with a taunting smirk he whispers. "You know, I'm the dad right," he ended with a lame chuckle.

Kyle laughed at Butters’ comment, before turning to Stan with a raised eyebrow. He rested his hands on Stan’s pecks, before giving two pats to the area with a joking tone. "No, sweetie. You're the PTA mom and I'm the emotionally distant daddy who tears the family apart." 

Tweek heard the call, walking out of the store room. He gave a wave to Stan and Kyle, before turning to operate the machine. They didn't even have to ask for Tweek to make their orders, since Tweek seemed to have a way to know exactly what they wanted. A caramel macchiato with a shot of espresso for Kyle and a cappuccino for Stan. "H-Hey, guys! How are you two?"

Stan smile had widen as Kyle's comment made him laugh harder than needed. When he finished his giggle fest, he turned to Tweek. "We're doing alright," Stan accepted the drinks. He couldn't help but be impressed it's not like they get the same exact thing every time but, every time Tweek knows just what they need. It's like he could read minds or something. He held Kyle's just out of reach to get back at him for denying him of his daddy rights. He had the height, he might as well use it. He simply continued to question Tweek, "how was dinner last night- they didn't pick on you right?" Stan's voice was laced with concern, but he tried to mask it seeing as Tweek hated when people fussed over him. Even if it was hard not to baby him, Stan knew Tweek was a full grown adult, he just didn't like seeing the small blonde hurt. He could be concerned of his friends if he wanted to, it was in his nature. 

Kyle reached up to try and grab the coffee, before balancing on his tip toes. He huffed when he still couldn't reach it, before jumping up to try and reach it. He hated when Stan would do this. He had never hit much of a growth spurt after middle school, which resulted in him being shorter than most of his friends. He occasionally would say a silent prayer due to both Tweek and Butters being shorter than him. He was at least luckier than them. 

Tweek wiped off the counter, "it was fine- how it always is, you know? I mean- I’m seriously fine! N-Nothing really eventful happened." It wasn’t a complete lie, he was fine. He hated every second of the dinner, but it was boring so there wasn’t anything eventful. The bitterness of Bryce’s family, passive aggressive insults which bordered on plain aggressive, and his parents mindlessly agreeing with it all simply to impress were all normal occurrences at any events in which Bryce’s parents were involved. 

While Stan was distracted talking with Tweek, Kyle had dragged a chair over to Stan. Sadly, he was used to having to climb to get what he needed. Stan had a habit of putting things on the top shelf, which Kyle had to climb onto a counter to properly reach- and he wanted his coffee, goddamnit. He climbed onto the chair, before simply taking the cup of Stan's hand. He smirked, before patting the top of Stan’s head (an area he typically wouldn’t be able to reach) and jumping down from the chair. He heard the conversation between Stan and Tweek. He was slightly worried, but he wasn’t going to push the subject. Pushing subjects could lead to Tweek freaking out, and Tweek freaking out would lead to everyone else trying to calm him down or begin freaking out themselves. It was truly a vicious cycle, which Kyle was not going to deal with at the moment.

Stan, on the other hand, wasn't satisfied with that answer. He wanted to press on and get more out of him, but Butters' slight shake of the head and the way Kyle looked at him was all the reasons he needed not to. "Well, okay, but if Bryce ever crosses the line again make sure to tell me. I'll kick his ass!" Stan promised.

"Ass kicking? Who? You? Don't make me laugh, Marsh." Craig suddenly appeared literally out of nowhere. Seriously, was this man a freaking ninja? He had his camera firmly in his hand that signified he had been on another one of his 'walks'. Stan made a childish pouty face, blinking his eyes at the tall boy. 

"Craiiiiiggg, kick Bryce's ass already~" Stan pulled off his best Cartman whine to date. If there was anything the fat ass taught them; whining always gets you what you want.

Craig flipped him off.

The Cartman whine would usually work, except if your victim was Craig Tucker.

Said boy went behind the counter to pull Tweek in for a hug. He held him close, resting his nose in Tweek's surprisingly soft hair. He inhaled, smelling the usual attack of coffee and creamer that Tweek held. He smiled to himself, no weird cologne today. "Hey, Tweekers,” he smiled softly his face still buried. 

Butters sent Tweek an unwarranted wink. He was really spending way too much time with Kenny.

Craig only pulled away to look at the others who were staring at them. "I came here to tell you guys: Clyde's throwing a welcome back party at our apartment tomorrow night." He bluntly informed, not even bothering to tell the the time or if they need to bring anything. He didn't really care if they came or not. It was all Clyde's idea anyway. He kept holding Tweek close. 

 

Tweek rested his weight on Craig, wrapping his arms around him. He smiled, burying his face in his shoulder briefly. He had his own familiar scent to him that made Tweek just melt and feel all cuddly and warm. He really didn’t want to move away, it was almost like a drug that he just wanted to keep going back to. He was weak to it.

Stan couldn't help but feel jealous that Craig could hold Tweek so unashamed. He looked at his super best friend and thought about him embracing someone else and felt his skin crawl. No doubt about it. He hated the idea.

"C-Can you please not kick my boyfriend's ass!" Tweek squeaked out. While, he wasn't really sure if he would be upset if Bryce got the shit kicked out of him- it might give him some life lessons. But, as his boyfriend he knew that he should be wildly opposed to the idea. 

Kyle gave Stan a elbow in the ribs, before giving him a warning glare. If they were going to kick Bryce’s ass, they couldn’t plot in front of Tweek. He knew that Tweek most likely would get mad at them, and it was better if he didn’t know. He turned his bright green eyes away from Stan, giving a smile to Craig to respond about his party invitation. "We'll be there, it better not disappoint."

Kenny threw the door open, a grin on his face. He outstretched his arms in an 'I'm here, bow down peasants’ gesture. He shot them all a wink, before sitting on the table and leaning back. "Did you all have a meet up without telling me? How rude of all of you, and here I thought that I was loved. You are all forever shamed!"

The moment Kenny entered, Butters shone so much Stan almost pulled out his sunglasses. The sunny teen bounced up to Kenny and immediately jumped into his arms. Even though they spent the night together, Butters still missed him. The pair had been nearly inseparable lately.

Kenny was quick to wrap his arms around Butters. He pulled him closer, to give him a soft kiss. He couldn’t really do this with anyone except Butters. Even his past lovers were more fuck buddies than actual relationships. Him and Butters hadn’t put a title on what they were, but Kenny just didn’t know how to. 

Craig just ignored the poor boy and Stan shot Kenny a glare. 

"Take your showers at Butters' house from now on, jack off in his bathroom!" Stan stuck his tongue out childishly.

He pouted and turned to Stan, "but Stanny, our bathroom is just so perfect for a good jack off. The acoustics in there are amazing so everything sounds so sexy." Butters giggled with innocently flushed cheeks.

Kyle crinkled his nose in disgust, he knew it happened- but he didn't need to visualize his friend/roommate jacking off in the shower that they all used.

Stan linked arms with Kyle and started to pull him towards the door. "Let's go on a date, Kyle, it's too crowded here." he shot the dirty boy a pointed look. 

He finished his drink, dropping the cup in the trash. He followed Stan, giving a wave to everyone else, "at that note- we'll be off. Don't cause too much of a ruckus. If someone dies, blame Cartman."

Craig gave a thumbs up, finally, separating from Tweek because a customer had came in. They couldn’t exactly cuddle while the blond was supposed to be working. That was just unprofessional.

 

Tweek reluctantly moved away from Craig to help the customer, since he had a job to do. However, he let Craig stay behind the counter. 

Butters was content just being held and peppering Kenny with loving kisses. "Bye, bye, guys!" he waved off before practically jumping into Kenny's arms. Kenny held Butters, resting his head on his shoulder. He loved just holding Butters, he could never get sick of it. 

Stan scoffed at the surrounding PDA. He rolled his eyes and continued out the door. "So, where do you wanna go today? We got the arcade, the movies, the park: your choice."

Kyle shrugged, tilting his head to look up at Stan. He kept a hold on his arm, "I don't know, really. I don't care, either. I just like being around you." It was true, Kyle just wanted to be around Stan, even if it was incredibly cheesy.

Trying to contain his poor weak heart Stan let out a smile. "Let's go to the park then," he suggested leading him along. This time they walked a bit slower taking in their surroundings. 

You'd think with the fact that they live here, they'd be sick of the quiet little mountain town by now. But the forever changing, continuously evolving suburb always made for a pleasant surprise. The way the snow covered the ground and how the birds chirped beat any big time busy city by a long shot. They just enjoyed Mother Nature’s melody and cleared their heads of any thoughts that were too complicated to comprehend. Kyle walked with Stan, staying close to him. They were always close with each other, they didn't care about physical barriers between them. Physical contact was normal for them, even when they had the whole sidewalk to themselves. The redhead glanced around, giving a faint smile. 

 

When they made it to the park Stan saw the empty court and turned to Kyle—getting a great idea. "Wanna play basketball?" he knew that was a silly question. Kyle loves basketball.

He looked at the court, before letting a grin spread across his cheeks. "Oh, it's on. I am so going to kick your ass." He shed his jacket, dropping it on a nearby bench. If they were going to play ball, Kyle was going all in.

Stan smirked. "Is that so? How about we do the usual bet?" he tilted his head, uneven ivory locks swinging against his forehead. Their usual; loser has to piggyback winner once around the track. It had been that way for as long as either one of them could remember. 

Kyle smirked and nodded, before stretching his arms above his head. He replied with a simple, “bet.”

"Then don't cry to me when you lose, baby," Stan's voice dropped an octave darker. He threw his jacket on the ground and grabbed one of the balls that was left behind for anyone to play with. That was how their community was, they shared their things because they're was practically nothing to do other than drugs and getting into trouble. 

The game began. 

Stan held his all, bouncing the ball from the ground to his hand back down again. He matched Kyle's movements looking him straight in the eyes. Despite his advantageous height, Kyle had strong legs that gave him the ability to practically flash pass him and sore. Stan knew the best out of anyone he went to every single game Kyle played in. He was the president of his fan club. 

When Kyle scored one on him, however, Stan felt his pride being crushed a tiny bit.

Stan may be the best football player, but Kyle was the best at basketball. He was short, but he was fast and powerful. With his strong bottom half, he could sneak past anyone and score, even if they were twice his size, it was something he had used to his advantaged whenever he played. He could duck under people without them even realizing he was there. He was almost a ninja of basketball. 

Kyle swiftly stole the ball from right under Stan, jumping up and scoring a basket. He made a mocking gesture, holding up a singular finger. "Kyle one, Stan zero. Don't worry, I'll make sure that I enjoy my piggy back ride of victory."

Stan grit his teeth. He couldn't let Kyle get away with that. He quickly devised a plan and moved to execute it. He faked Kyle out knowing the boy wouldn’t fall for it and once he reached for the ball his reflexes kicked in throwing it to no one in particular and grabbing Kyle's sides. He let out a triumphant "heh" before he began his tickling assault. Yes, he was childish but he just couldn't accept failure....not without a fight. Even if that fight was a tickle war in the middle of an impromptu basketball game. 

As soon as Kyle felt Stan's hands on his sides, he let out a shriek of surprise before doubling over and clutching his sides. He was ticklish, sue him. His natural reflex was to curl in on himself whenever he was tickled. 

"Stan! That is such a foul!" He laughed, a few snorts coming out in the process. Snorting while he laughed was uncommon for Kyle, it had always been that way. He took a step back to try and avoid Stan, before moving a hand to swat at Stan.

Stan wiggles his fingers threateningly. "Who cares! Now let's see you get pass me!" he lunged forward chasing after the red head. Trying to get at him again.

"Oh- it is on!" the readhead straightened back up, before rushing at Stan. He used his height to his advantage, ducking under his outstretched arms before grabbing the ball. He shot it, giving a bow after it fell through the hoop. "Kyle two, Stan zero."

Stan tsked childishly. He was just too fast! Even after getting back the ball and pushing Kyle back (gently he could never use all his strength on Kyle), he still couldn't score. As Shelley would say during their hour long arguments in the bathroom doorway his aim sucks.

Stan panted, sweat falling down his side burns. His used the back of his hand to wipe the sweat off his chin. He watched as the ball circled around the rim once before going in.

Dammit. Five to nothing and that was game.

Kyle was barely sweating. He simply rested his hands on his hips, before tilting his head back and laughing. Just like he said, he crushed Stan. He did another bow, "my dearest Stanley, now that I have kicked your ass, you indept me a piggy back ride." 

He laughed, pushing a mess of red curls out of his face. He was glad he won, not only so he wouldn’t have to lug around the giant muscle beast that was Stan, but also because he enjoyed piggy back rides from Stan. He knew that Stan wouldn’t drop him, and if he was dropped he would kick Stan’s ass on a no mercy run. 

Stan smiled deciding to play along. "As you wish, my elven prince," Stan thought back to their game they'd play as children. He kneeled on one knee and took Kyle's hand into his own. "Your royal chariot awaits, your highness." Stan turned around and waited for Kyle to hop on. Once he was secured with his arms around his next and Stan's firmly placed under his knees he got up steadying himself and hiked Kyle up. Kyle was pretty light so he didn't find himself struggling the least bit.

A moment later he took off. Running around, using what stamina he had left to make it so the wind was blowing through their hair. He 'neighed' and 'whinnied' to simulate the sounds of a horse as his feet slapped against the concrete.

Kyle rested his chin on Stan's, arms wrapping around his shoulders. He laughed as Stan ran around. He threw his head back, enjoying the time. He kicked his legs slightly, before moving to lock his ankles in front of Stan instead of letting his feet hang down.

Once the lap was complete, Stan was completely tired out. He fell against the grass making sure he fell first so he got the brunt of the ground and Kyle could rest atop of him. His breath came out labored and shallow. He turned over, back against the ground and he looked up at the sunny sky. Only silence between them. He let it simmer down before opening his mouth.

"Ky, if you find the one...you promise to still stay by my side?" Stan asked quietly. He shut his eyes, he didn't want to sound so insecure, but he couldn't care less since it was Kyle of all people he was barring his heart to.

Kyle laid on top of Stan for a few moments, before scooting off of him and laying down next to him. He looked up at the sky, enjoying the view. He was at peace here with Stan, true peace. There wasn’t anything or anyone else that he had to worry about. No moms, no blind dates, no girlfriends, just Stan. 

He turned his bright green eyes to look at Stan, "of course. No one would ever be able to replace you- and I mean ever. Not even in a million years.” With that, he grabbed Stan's hand and gave it a squeeze. "I'm not going anywhere unless you’re with me.”

Stan felt a bit more at ease with his promise. Squeezing back, he just laid there and enjoyed Kyle's company. He felt really nice, just overall pleasant being next to him. 

But alas, their moment of tranquility was over. His phone buzzed and Stan made a movement to grab it. He picked up the call.

"Hello...? He- calm down! What's wrong?!" Stan sat up fast his eyes wide and alert it was Wendy and whatever it was, was really freaking her out. "Everything is gonna be okay! Listen...." Stan looks at Kyle. He didn't want to ditch him but he had a panicking girlfriend to take care of. "I'll be right over." he hung up and gave Kyle an apologetic look. "I know it's supposed to be our date day, but....Wendy needs me...you understand right?" Stan looked pleadingly.

Kyle had gotten lost in his own mind for a moment. Of course, Wendy had to interrupt that. He had to remember and be reminded that Stan wasn’t his. Yes, Stan was his super best friend, but Stan wasn’t his boyfriend. Stan was Wendy’s boyfriend. He tried his best to not be bitter or jealous towards her, since he knew how much Stan cared about her. But he couldn't help it, being in a room with the pair of them made him want to scream sometimes. She was a nice, smart girl. He should be happy for Stan, but he couldn't get passed the fact that he had chosen her. He chose her, not him. Even if he might not have been aware that there was a choice at all. 

He sighed, before nodding and letting go of Stan's hand. "I get it. Go, I'll be fine. I'm sure I can go catch up with the rest of the guys." He sat up, stretching his pale, freckled arms above his head.

Stan wavered for a moment. He opened his mouth to say something but his phone buzzed reminding him just how urgent this was. He closed his mouth before reopening it. "She may need me to stay the night so...don't wait up."

Kyle nodded, standing up. He grabbed it’s jacket off of it’s forgotten place on the ground, before sliding it over his arms. "It's fine, I get it. I'm your roommate, not your keeper. Just… go. She needs you." He glanced around, not really sure what else to say. He was slightly ticked that their time was interrupted, but he knew that he couldn't just hog Stan from Wendy, especially since it seems like Stan was needed elsewhere at the moment. 

Stan rubbed the back of his head. He wanted to say something but opted to not end up with his foot in his mouth. He patted his shoulder and walked away.

Kyle watched him, before turning the other way to go back to Tweak Bros. With any luck, the rest of his friends would still be there and he could use them to keep his mind occupied. Otherwise, he would just go home and study. Either way, he'd do his best to keep thoughts of a certain black haired couple out of his head.

"Well, what do we have here?" Craig smirked seeing the redhead returned. "What happened, Broflovski, your boyfriend ditched you?" Craig interviewed a shit eating grin spread across his face. A lot of the South Park in habitants seemed to be in there now. At least a lot from their friend group. Craig ended up helping out donning a green apron seeing as it was getting busy and Tweek was freaking out in the back of the store. He wouldn’t be able to man the desk at the moment. 

"Ahw, don't be mean Craig!" Butters pouted and crossed his arms. Even though he was trying to look stern he just looked like a pissed off kitten. He heard people coo softly. It truly was one hell of an adorable sight. 

 

Kenny gave a fond smile to Butters, running his thin fingers through his hair. "You make trying to be threatening, adorable."

 

"Craig, I want a number five, a number 8 and two largest of your chocolatiest drinks you have on hand!" Clyde screamed from his seat in the back. He sat back looking at Token and Jimmy. "Do you guys want anything?" their mouths dropped.

Jimmy thought for a moment, before nodding. “Uh- I’ll take a n-nuhhhhh…...-n-number 9, fellas.”

Token, who was paying for all of this, rolled his eyes at Clyde. “Number 11.”

Kyle scoffed and rolled his eyes at Craig, otherwise not bothering to reply. He saw the mass amount of people, grabbing an apron for himself and putting it on. A little extra help never hurt anyone. Especially unpaid help. He looked at Clyde, a smirk on his lips. "Careful, you might start looking like Cartman soon if you keep up that diet." 

Tweek was in the back of the store, desperately taking inventory and getting drinks and food ready. He was not used to this much business at one time. Needless to say, he was grateful for the friends who had decided to help work. He really would be completely fucked without them here. 

Clyde turned red. "Hey! I'm still sexy~" he retorted. But speaking of the lord fat ass himself, seemed to summon him. Cartman entered at that moment, complaining about the rush and how he just simply wanted to take a shit. After dating Heidi he became less of a dick but he still is a huge asshole. The sight made Clyde change his mind about what he wanted to get, "maybe I'll just take two 8s and a small healthy drink..." he curled into himself.

With everyone's help, the rush quickly died down to just a few, who for the most part were all regular customers. Craig sighed taking a rest next to the counter. 

"Is it always like this??" He asked, exasperated.

Kyle had been making Cartman’s drink. Their rivalry never truly died down, they were still horrible to each other. If Kyle had access to laxatives, he would have dumped the whole bottle into Cartman’s drink with no remorse. Sadly, he didn’t have a bottle of instant shitters, so he settled for standing in the corner and spitting in the cup. A classic ‘fuck you’ in the world of preparing food. He put a lid on the cup, shoving it into Cartman’s tubby hand. 

He quickly composed himself, deciding not to let a tub of lard get the best of him. He brought everything to Clyde's table, before beginning to clean other tables as people left. 

Tweek came out of the back room, restocking the sugar. He quickly shook his head, "no- it's never this busy! Usually it's just you guys and other random stragglers!"

"Yeah, it's pretty strange see-seeing as everyone is usually at Harbucks....!!" Butters gasped. "Do you think Bryce has something to do with the booming business?" Butters whispered the next part to Tweek. He couldn't rule out the idea that Bryce sent a hoard of people over to Tweak Bros. He had that kind of power. 

Craig heard Bryce's name and let out a little growl. Even the name made him want to punch something (preferably Bryce himself) in the jaw. 

"B-But why would he do that?! He knows that I'm working alone today!" Tweek let out a stressed noise, before bringing his hand down to rest on the counter. "T-Thanks, by the way." 

Kyle nodded, crossing his arms over his chest. "I can't think of any other reasons. Really, there's nothing going on today that should cause an influx in people coming here. That just doesn’t happen."

"I-I think he's just a natural b-born ass-asshole...." Butters looked up thoughtfully. "Bu-but enough about him....how are you fairing Kyle?" Butter asked with as much tact as he could. The last thing he wanted to do was piss Kyle off.

Kyle nodded in agreement, muttering something along the lines of "that's an understatement." He shrugged at the question about himself, "I'm fine. Stan ditched me to go with Wendy, so that kind of sucks." That, of course, was another understatement. It really did suck, in his mind at least.

Butters gave a lopsided frown. He studied their downtrodden faces for a moment. "Aww, I'm sorry, bud, is he coming back at least?" Butters turned his head to the brooding red head.

Kenny raised an eyebrow, before dragging a hand down his freckled cheeks. "When are you two just going to get past this pining and fuck your feelings out?" Kenny made the familiar hand gesture for sex to go along with that comment, “I mean- you two have so much sexual tension sometimes, that’s gotta be some great sex when you finally rip each other’s clothes off and ravish each other.” 

Kyle, deciding to ignore Kenny- he was not opening that can of worms right now, simply acknowledged Butters. "No, he's probably going to spend the night. She needs him," he sighed, dragging a hand through his hair and slumping in the seat. She wasn’t the only person who needed him sometimes.

"Pfft, more like needs his dick, amirite? Or am I right?" Cartman obnoxiously butted into the conversation. He was stuffing his face with a muffin spraying spit and crumbs everywhere. 

Craig curled his lip in disgust. "Shuddap, fat boy."

"Ey! I'm not fucking fat!" he argued back.

"No one fucking asked you, you fucking fat asshole." Kyle grumbled, flipping him off. He was not in the mood to deal with him at the moment. Plus, he hated him talking bad about his best friend. Or the thought of him and Wendy doing it. It was a visual that he did not need. 

"Look, Kahl, All I'm saying is, Stan most likely ditched you to help Wendy clean out her va-jay-jay." Cartman smirked, he really loves messing with the Jewish boy. Craig rolled his eyes not wanting to be involved and helped Tweek finish closing, he'd kick him out soon. Everyone else ignored the bastard like usual. Besides, no one wants to get involved when Kyle and Cartman are at it. It’s a near instant death sentence. 

"C-Cartman, oh golly, that's not nice...." Butters defended. "It's probably something a little more serious....right?" Butters quizzed Kyle.

"Is it even physically possible for you to shut your mouth for five seconds! You don’t know anything about any of this, yet you’re sticking your greasy nose into it. Why don’t you just shut the fuck up and shove more food in your mouth, fucking fatass!” He stood up, only to bang his hands against the table. Cartman might be taller and just overall bigger, but he didn’t scare Kyle in the slightest. No one could rile him up like the fatass. 

Tweek jumped at the sudden nose, moving closer to Craig. "L-Look, why don't we j-just calm down!" He didn’t really want a fight in his shop at the moment. 

Cartman banged his hands against the table, before walking up to Kyle and grabbing him by his collar. He pulled him closer, a low growl in his voice. "I said I'm not fat! You fuckin' ugly ass Je-" Cartman's words were cut short with a punch to the face from a fist which came seemingly out of nowhere. Everyone turned to see Stan, standing tensely with a pissed off snarl. It was unusual to see Stan with anything but a laid back smile on his face, seeing him truly mad was a rare occasion. If you listen closely you can hear Craig whisper 'nice' under his breath.

 

"Shut your fucking trash mouth." Stan growled. "I won't have you slandering my name, asshole."

Kyle growled again at Cartman. He was getting ready to shove the tub of lard off of him. He wasn't scared of him, he didn't have a reason to be. Of course, Stan had punched him before Kyle could get a chance. He stumbled back, regaining his composure. If it weren't for Stan standing there, Kyle most likely would have jumped at Cartman in an attack. Since he saw Stan, Kyle allowed himself to calm down. 

"Oí! That fucking hurt, you fags! I'm telling my girlfriend!!" Cartman immediately vacated the premises flipping everyone he could off. 

Stan stood there for a moment before shyly turning to Kyle. "I'm back...sorry about that...you wanna go home?" he offered a small unsure smile, only showcasing a few rows of perfectly aligned teeth. 

Kyle crossed his arms, before giving a small smile to Stan. "Yeah- let's go home."

A few moments later the two sat in Stan's old beat up car. He had driven to Wendy's house prior to the incident, and when he was finished helping her, he rode past Tweak Bros only to see Kyle and Cartman getting into it. Something they normally do, but when Stan saw how Cartman grabbed Kyle, he felt a fire ignite in the pits of his stomach that seemingly allotted him the right to smash his fat face in. He knew that Kyle could have taken care of himself, but he still couldn’t shake the feeling of pure rage he got from seeing Kyle being treated so roughly by Cartman. Even though they were both safe in his car with Journey’s Classics playing softly from the radio, he still was feeling a little pissed off. 

Stan was quiet, one hand on the steering wheel and the other holding Kyle's hand. Stan could sense the tension. He could practically taste it. He wanted to ask if Kyle was okay and if they were still cool but he just chose to go with; "I'm sorry for leaving you in the middle of our time, Kyle..."

Kyle was relaxed in the passenger seat. His hand found comfort in Stan’s, even though they nearly always drove hand and hand. He sighed, before turning his gaze to Stan. "It's fine, okay? I'm not the only person in your life." Kyle winced at himself. He didn't intend for it to come out so bitter.

Stan shuddered. The dreaded cold shoulder. He's going to dealing with this for a while. If there was one thing Kyle inherited from his mother it was her stubbornness (and her wide set of hips). He knew he had to make it up to the redhead some kind of way. A mad Kyle was a bad Kyle, if a bad Kyle could even be possible of existing. Stan wasn’t really sure most of the time. 

He squeezed his hand, admiring how soft his skin was and rubbed circles into his palm. The action could usually calmed him down. 

"But you're the most important." He informed with a warm smile decorating his lips as he stared forward, too embarrassed to look at his super best friend in the face. Plus, he had to be safe while they drove, that was a great excuse to not look at him. 

Kyle sighed, turning to look back out the window. He had gotten to a point where he just didn't know what to think. They were best friends, yet they acted like they were together. They acted like they were together, yet Stan had a girlfriend. It was all so hazy, and he couldn’t clear the fog. "You shouldn't let your girlfriend hear that." He knew that the comment was petty, but Kyle was more than willing to admit that he was a petty person. 

Stan cringed, damn. Kyle was pissed. Stan sighed, not knowing what to do. Maybe Kyle was tired of his shit. In the past, a sly comment, a prince charming smile, and some cuddles would have made Kyle instantly forgive him but now even Stan's charisma did nothing but land him in trouble. They arrived at the apartment fairly quickly. They let go of each other's hands and entered their shared apartment.

Kyle was tired of being chosen second. He wanted to be chosen first for once, and he wouldn’t let himself forgive Stan this time. He didn’t want to be the asshole who would make Stan choose one or the other. Even if he did try, he wasn’t 100% certain that he wouldn’t lose Stan. Instead of saying anything, he simply sauntered into his room and closed the door behind himself. It was his way of silently telling Stan that he needed time alone. 

Stan stood there with sunken shoulders. He whispered a soft ‘good night’ before going into his room. 

Stan's life was perfect, unrivaled athletic ability, a high paying job at the South Park dock, a hot girlfriend, and an apartment with his super best friend in the whole wide world.

A super best friend that he felt was more than a friend. 

Sighing he clutched the marriage license paper in his hands. How was he going to tell Kyle about this?

Fuck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AsexualBasilisk: Goodnight, listeners, goodnight. 
> 
>  
> 
> Sorry, I've been listening to too much Welcome to Night Vale lately.  
> Actually, I'm not sorry.  
> Also, since it's my birthday today: consider this my present to you. You're welcome.
> 
> Kwiyomiboo: I feel like I gotta say something too~ I'm quiet on here but I've been reading your comments and they give me so much life uwu thank you all for reading! See you next Monday (hopefully)


	3. Everyone Needs a Kenny, but Kenny Done Fucked Up. (Butters, ft a bit of Style)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenny and Butters were a special case. They weren't dating, but they weren't not dating. They were just Kenny and Butters. It's how it was, and it was just accepted. Other than his obligations to Butters, Kenny also had obligations to his friends to be the best damn advice giver he could be. For today, it required dealing with a slightly drunk and confused Stan- who he was always happy to help before he had to go through work. Really, the only thing that got him through work was the thought of Butters and joking with some of his co-workers. Things were great, especially after he was able to go watch Butters dance. But, as usual, Kenny had to go and fuck it up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to chapter 3, you've survived so far. Congratulations, have a virtual cookie. I can't give you a real cookie, but you can imagine one. Sit back, relax, and enjoy the chapter.

Butters woke up to the crisp morning chill. Apparently, he left the window open so the early birds could be heard as clear as day, last night, he opened it because it was hot and to air out the heavy smell of last night’s lascivious scene. He shivered then rolled over, rubbing his eye routinely before being met with a warm wall of flesh. He cuddled more into the warmth, wanting to surround himself with that feeling. He almost forget that Kenny had slept over last night. 

Kenny had woken up a few minutes prior, simply running his fingers through Butters’ small tiffs hair. He thought that Butters was beyond adorable when he was asleep- somehow even more then when he was awake, if that was even possible. There was just something about him looking completely at peace which made the sight refreshing as all Hell. He would never admit it out loud, but he could stare at Butters for hours. He smiled when Butters’ eyes opened, groggily mumbling a morning greeting. The little tinsy bubbles behind his ribcage were ignored when he pushed them aside and smile a crooked lazy grin. “Mornin’, babe.”

Butters groaned hearing the impossibly sexy, groggy voice Kenny had. You’d think after hearing it so many times he might’ve grown immunity. But– no, it still gave him the same exact amount of butterflies every single Goddamn time. 

The small blond frowned a bit, the obnoxious sun getting in his eyes, “G’mornin’, Ken.” he rasped before puckering up for a quick chaste kiss.

Finally pulling away, he sat up and stretched. He looked on the side of the bed for his underwear, or really any piece of clothing to put over his bare body. Finally finding a discarded shirt (who he assumed to be Kenny’s), he got out of bed and went to the bathroom. 

“I’ve got class in a few hours,” he stated while washing up. He didn’t bother to close the door, Kenny’s already seen everything anyway.

He grabbed his pain pills for his eye and brushed the hair out of the way. It was healed, but he still had some trouble seeing. The scar it left only a reminder of how often he would get hurt as a child. His knees were scratched up, his fingers bent slightly crooked from how many times he broke them. When he was younger he thought it was cool but the older he got to more inclined he felt to cover it up with makeup. His baby blue eyes traveled down to his gut and thighs. He was getting pretty thick, he wasn’t Cartman status- no one can beat Cartman- but he was definitely chubby. He frowned more, pinching at the excess flesh and watching as his thighs slapped and rubbed together. 

Kenny rolled out of bed, not even bothering to get dressed. Him and Butters had done the naked tango so many times, it really didn’t matter if his dick was out in the open. He pouted, before rubbing his eyes and sauntering to the bathroom. He snaked his arms around Butters’ waist, resting his chin on his shoulder and kissing softly along the side of the neck. He was cuddly in the morning, sue him. He mumbled into his flesh, “you’re so goddamn hot, you know? It’s so unfair sometimes.” 

“Agh!” Butters jumped, but found himself smiling at the sweet complement. Kenny always made him feel good about himself. He nuzzled back into the warmth, staying there for a while longer. “C’mon, Ken, I go-gotta get ready!” Butters complained, but didn’t make any attempt at moving. It was too hard, and he was much too comfortable. 

Only after snuggling for a few extra minutes did he do what he earlier thought to be impossible, moving out of Kenny’s embrace. He kissed his cheek before going to his closet and looking through to find what he wanted to wear for the day. 

“I’m feeling a little fem today…” He voiced aloud, picking out three of his best dresses. He chose one with a lacey white top and a baby blue flowy bottom. He wore leggings underneath and a jean jacket on top. Doing a twirl, he turned back to Kenny. “H-How do I look?” He blinked innocently, giving a small head tilt.

Kenny sat back on the bed, semi reluctantly. He wanted to stay cuddling with Butters all day, but life and duty calls. Even though he swore he block that bitch’s number. He watched Butters get ready, snapping a photo with his phone. “You look amazing, as always.”

Butters chuckled softly to himself, “Thanks!” He leaned over Kenny, kissing his forehead. “I still got some time, I’m gotta get me some breakfast at Tweak’s!”

Kenny nodded, “I’ll be at work when you get done with class,” he pulled him back down- only to give him another kiss. “You should come visit me, you know? A lot of my coworkers would love to meet you.” 

Butters nodded, “of course! I’ll come by and pick you up!” He put on his ankle boots. “Oh, Ken, you should probably check on Stan and Kyle… I don’t know… I feel like something might be wrong…” He frowned, shrugging. 

“Don’t work, I’ll check up on them- and steal all of the food. Don’t worry about it.” He winked and blew a kiss at Butters. 

Butters gave a chuckle at the comment, “lock the door when you leave- bye, bye!” With that, Butters was gone. No ‘I love you’s,’ even though he wanted to say it desperately, he just didn't know if he could say it. Him and Kenny were ‘together’ but not ‘together’ if that made any sense. They did normal couple-y things but Butters knew that Kenny was uncomfortable with the whole idea of actually dating. Kenny was lucky to be with an understanding boy like Butters, willing to wait for him and take baby steps. Even if the cost was a real committed relationship.

He smiled at the door for a few minutes after Butters had left, almost like a lovesick dog who’s waiting for its owner to walk back through the door. After snapping himself out of it, he decided to actually get dressed. He was so happy with Butters, so incredibly happy. If anyone could make him commit, it would be the bubbly blond. But, the thought of being tied down to a single person filled him with fear. 

 

Meanwhile, Stan sat in his apartment, hunched over their kitchen island with a bottle of whiskey clutched in his hands. Thankfully, Kyle was already in class, so he didn’t have to worry about the red head seeing him looking like a mess. He tilted the bottle up and took a drink straight from it. “Aaaaghhhg,” he wiped his chin off. “Hic, it can’t be gone already! This is a new bottle!” He looked through the hole, seeing it truly was empty. A drop still left. He shrugged, turning bottoms up once again and letting the harsh, bitter liquid drip onto his tongue. 

Kenny made sure Butters’ door was locked, before gleefully going to the apartment. Technically, he lived there- but he had been spending so much time at Butters, it was almost like he had two homes. He threw open the door, before closing it behind himself. He went straight to the kitchen, completely prepared to make himself a sandwhich because god damn it, he was hungry. His eyes widened when he saw Stan, before grabbing the whiskey (with much difficulty) and sitting it away from him. He quickly led him to the couch, before sitting him down and plopping next to him. “Okay, talk to me. Therapist Kenny is officially in the building. I’ll accept your payment at the end of the session.”

“No, fuck you.” Stan growled. He thought for a moment, “wa-wait a min- hic- ute… take me to the store- I need some more booze, here!” Stan leaned over, laying against the blond. He was an aggressive and affectionate drunk, they all grew used to his conflicted speech. 

“No, you’re not drinking anything else.” He sighed, crinkling his nose at the heavy booze smell. It reminded him of his childhood home, he quickly brushed the thought away. He wrapped his arms around Stan, running his fingers through the dark hair. It usually calmed people down, it was worth a try here. “Please, can you talk to me? You’re really worrying me.” 

Stan was reluctant for a moment but Kenny had the power over anyone that made you want to be held by him. It was like a truth serum with blond hair, he could see why girls and guys would both jump in his bed. He was a persuasive fucker.

“...Ss fu-fucking Kyle… man… and fuu-hic-ckin’ Wendy too! What do they want me from- hic- me? Huh?! I couldn’t tell her no- she needed some help!” Stan cried, knocking a glass over. 

Kenny nodded, listening intently. He picked up the glass, moving it to where Stan couldn’t hurt either of them with it. He wasn’t usually a serious person, but he could be responsible when he needed to be. He still liked to be comedic when he could, laughter is the best medicine after all. “Calm down, alright? We’ll figure this out. I’m sure if you put our brains together we could be a semi smart fucking team here.”

“Pfft- two dumbasses shouldn’t try and fix the mess I just made… what the hell am I going to do, Kenny??” Stan let his head rest in his hands, pulling at his hair. “Wendy… I have love for her… She’s so smart and beautiful and every moment I spend with her… I just want to be a better person…” He started sobering up a bit, “bu-but…” He wiped the snot from his nose with the back of his hand, “ Kyle… I don’t know- I think I love him? Like every moment I’m away from him is pure torture and when I’m with him, I am a better person… Please tell me you know what I mean?” Stan looked at the blonde with pleading eyes. He felt crazy, confused, and very—very shitty.

Kenny listened, before nodding. “Look, sometimes two dumbasses can solve a problem better than Albert fucking Einstein.” He pat Stan’s shoulder, before running his fingers through his hair again. “I can’t tell you want your emotions are, you have to figure those out all by yourself. But, love’s kind of a bitch. A blind bitch. You don’t choose who you love, and it can be blurry of who you love and who you want to love. The asskicker is that I’ve heard the key to figuring it out is to not think it through. You just have to stop, and do what feels right. Thinking about it makes it so much more complicated and foggy.”

Stan almost laughed. Here he was, in a committed relationship and asking advice from the guy who’s been with more people than he could count. Not that, that was bad. Just he would have never guessed a boy who never been in a relationship pass a steamy one night stand. He threw his head back, letting out a rambunctious laugh. “Kenny, I really fucked up. I’m royally fucked over, dude.” He paused, wondering if he should say it. He needed to- he had to. Holding it in was just making him go crazy. Sighing, he finally decided to spill it- spill all of it. “I fucking married her.” like a band-aid, Stan spewed out that sentence like words were going out of style. 

Kenny’s eyes widened, if he were in a sitcom or had just taken a sip- he would be doing a spit take right about now. Instead, he just started to laugh. Laughing was how he dealt with stress. “Wait- hold the fucking phone. You married her?! Legally fucking married her? Dude- shouldn’t you like have this shit fucking figured out before you go get legally bound to someone?!”

“I know, I know! It’s totally fucked but she was in a very bad situation- her dad went bankrupt! I tried scrounging up as much money as I could but it still wasn’t enough so in the end we needed to get a loan but they wouldn’t give it to us…” Stan stared at the coffee table, “we found out that if you’re married, you can get a loan easier… so we did.” He let his head fall, “the worst part is that I should be happy even if we did it at a courthouse from necessity. She’s the love of my life right? Not many people get to say that they married their perfect person… right? But….” red curls, clear emerald eyes, and orange freckles flashed in his mind. Fuck, I’m so messed up....” Stan carried on, not feeling numb enough. He reached out for the bottle, feeling anger when he realized that it wasn’t magically refilled and still empty. He jumped up, “I need more.”

“No, you fucking don’t.” Kenny grabbed his arm, before pulling him back down. He looked to him, “look- I know I’m not the most committed guy here- but I watch a fuckton of romcoms. I kind of know what I’m talking about here. If Wendy is really the love of your life, I really doubt that you would have any feelings for anyone else.” He thought for a moment, “okay- play a game with me. You have one second to come up with a word to describe each person I name. It has to be your first thought, no taking time to think it through.”

Stan looked at him wearily. The moment he said ‘romcom’ he wanted to slap him upside the head. But… what if he’s onto something? Kenny did have good advice sometimes, he just couldn’t follow it himself for the life of his left nut. Stan sat back, keeping eye contact. “Okay, I’ll play.”

“Okay, so we’ll start simple. Remember, first word or thought. No thinking it through here.” He leaned back, throwing his feet onto the coffee table. “Tweek.”

“Coffee addict.”

“Craig.”

“Handsome asshole.”

“Me?” 

“Whore… Whore with a stupidly good heart.” Stan leaned back and rolled his eyes, this was dumb. How was he going to find out about his Wendy problem?

“Awwwww, how sweet of you! Speaking of sweet, Butters.”

“Innocence. Must protect.” Stan shot Kenny a warning glare, one that said ‘hurt Butters and I hurt you.’ 

“Agreed.” He nodded, a smile on his lips. He got the message, definitely. “Wendy.” 

Stan smiled softly, “a great woman.”

“Kyle.”

Suddenly, his smile faded. Stan’s eyebrows knotted together. What was this feeling? What was he thinking? The words caught in his throat, a little too taboo even for his own ears to hear. He bit his lip, catching Kenny’s gaze. His mouth moved but sound was unable to come out. His head fell again, “my soulmate.”

Kenny nodded, before grinning a bit. “Well, Stanley, I think you just answered your own question.” He reached over, patting his shoulder. “From years of observation, I have to tell you that I’m fairly certain that Kyle feels the same for you. You two are basically soulmates, how have you not realized it sooner?” 

Stan gave him an incredulous look. “Listen, I’m not trying to be a whiny teenage girl that makes everything complicated for no reason- but I can assure you that me and Kyle may act gay. But I think I would fucking know if my best fucking friend had the hots for me, asshole.” Stan rolled his eyes, “enough of your mind games. I have class and you have work… Plus, I think I need some alone time now.”

Kenny rolled his eyes, before replying in a sing-song voice. “You didn’t know that you had the hots for him~ How are you supposed to recognize his feelings for you?” He laughed, before standing up and stretching. “Yeah, yeah. We have obligations and shit.”

“I need to sober up, I’m gonna go shower. Thanks for talking with me, I really needed to tell someone.” He gave a small, reassuring smile. He’ll be fine with time. At least, he fucking hoped so. 

He pulled him into a quick hug, “I know, I’m a pretty great friend so I guess I won’t tell anyone. But I think you’re going to need to have a talk with your wife.” He pulled back, before patting his shoulders. “You and Kyle are my best friends, I really want you two to be happy.”

Stan shuddered, he still wasn’t used to the word wife. He gave a smile at the last comment, before sighing. He stripped again, he really had no shame here. “By the way- don’t tell anyone else about this. Especially Kyle.” He warned, before heading to the bathroom to wash off the smell of liquor and regret. 

“I never heard a thing!” He nodded, before dragging a hand across his lips in a zipper motion. He went to the kitchen, grabbing some chips and drink, before leaving to go to work. 

“Kenny!!!” 

Craig and those guys happened to be right outside, on motherfucking golf carts. Clyde was too busy going barely 5 miles per hour to greet the blond. Token was the only polite one, who actually stopped and said hello. Meanwhile, Craig had flipped him off as he ‘sped’ past. 

“Whu-whu-whuuu-what’s up, K-Kenneth?” Jimmy gave a gummy grin from the passenger seat of Token’s cart. 

Kenny raised an eyebrow at the scene in front of him, before laughing. He jumped onto the back of one, he was so getting in on this. “Not much- but take me on a ride into the sun!”

Tweek, who was sitting next to Craig, gave a smile to Kenny. He then turned back to Craig, tilting his head in slight confusion. “W-Why are we riding on golf carts- again?”

Craig smirked, feeling a little proud. “Ya see, when you got a best friend who's richer than Tom Hanks and Beyonce, you get to have special privileges like racing his dad’s old golf carts out in the lawn.”

Token rolled his eyes, “more like, you guys stole my dad’s golf carts just to goof around and if he finds out then my black ass is grass.” 

“Plus, these are so going to make the party tonight lit!” Clyde stood up and threw his hands in the showing, showing off the devil horns. He somehow figured out how to play the radio on the contraption, and was blasting it like he was in a real whip. 

“Token, my man, you majorly lucked out.” Kenny laughed, before looking around the cart. It was true, Token did luck out. He was born with more money than Kenny had ever had in his entire life. He wasn’t bitter towards Token, he deserved it. Plus, he wasn’t a stuck up asshole with a stick up their ass and a complex. 

Tweek, on the other hand, was worried that they would either crash, get in trouble, or both. He let out a squeak and covered his eyes, “w-we’re all going to die!”

“I’m not going to let you die,” Craig replied reassuringly. But the devil inside of him, told him to do donuts so he could freak the fuck out of the small blond. This caused Tweek to let out another squeal, before wrapping his arms around Craig with an exclamation of his name. This only encouraged Craig, causing him to laugh manically as he waved goodbye to Kenny. He finally listened to Tweek, slowing down. Upon them slowing down, Tweek calmed down and slapped Craig gently in the forearm. 

“I’ll see you guys in a minute, I’m gonna drive Kenny to work!” Token excused himself while the children were at play. “Now, let’s put this thing into hyper drive!” He moved the stick shift and they went a whole 7 blocks per hour. 

“Wha-wa-woah! Slow down, fast and furious!” Jimmy deadpanned, “a-a-at this rate, we’ll make it there by n-n-next Wednesday.”

Kenny leaned back, “if you go faster than this- we might break the space-time continuum.”

It took them at least twenty minutes to get to Kenny’s work. Reaching their destination, Token sat back. “Aren’t you going to pay me?” It was at this point where one might realize that he was a bit faded. 

Kenny rolled his eyes at Token, before pretending to think. “Hmmmm, I can give you a chewed up piece of gum and a blowjob? Maybe my first born child if you’re into that?”

Token just laughed, tilting his head back in the smooth, suave way he does before he shook his head and politely declined. “Just fucking with you, you want me to pick you up later?”

Kenny grinned, before patting his head. “Normally- I would so take you up on that. You’re totally a better ride than Janice. She’s like the grandmother I never had- bomb ass cookies included, but she doesn’t shut up about her cats. She’s up to nine now, by the way.” He smirked, “buttttttt today Butters is meeting me here. No offense, but Butters totally outranks you.” 

“Kay.” Token replied not taking any offense, moving it out of park and fist bumping the blond. “Tell your boyfriend to bring that dip he always makes for Craig, he won’t admit it but that asshole is in love with it. The party just won’t be the same without a drunk Craig caressing a bowl of salsa on the floor… preferably naked.” Token wiggled his eyebrows. Most people thought that Token was the quiet, nice black guy. He was- but he was also just as much of a conniving horn dog as the rest of them. He’s Craig and Clyde’s best friend for God’s sake.

“W-Wait? Kenny and Buttes are d-duuh- dating?” Jimmy leaned over, trying to whisper. It proved difficult, due to his lisp and the fact that they were all high as hell. Token just shrugged starting up the vehicle.

Kenny’s eyes widened, before he walked alongside the golf cart for a short distance. “Look- we’re not actually dating! Okay, but I’ll still ask him about the dip. That dip is the shit.” He quickly nodded, before waving them off, blowing a kiss, and skipping inside. He looked at the clock, actually making sure that he had gotten there on time. 

Jimmy snorted at the last part. Token simply tsked, “sure, we all have sex with cute little blond boys. Just make sure you treat him right, y-you duh-don't want him being taken away by someone who w-will.” once and awhile Jimmy had something protolithic to say. 

“Bye Kenny, see you tonight!” Token waved off and left, after ten minutes since the golf cart was not going any faster than before. 

Kenny got through his workday like normal. He worked at a fabric shop, which he completely and unironically enjoyed. Fight him. His co-workers were awesome and they were always willing to talk shit when there was no one around. It was at least ten times better than the time he had taken home ec in school. All of his co-workers knew about his life, including Butters. Which meant, a lot of them were eager to see the blonde. Janice pinched his cheeks, Margret gave him some hard candies, and Lucy needed him to grab a few things from the top shelf. The work day was quite short—he only works there part time a few hours a couple days a week. They needed young people and Kenny didn't mind a few extra dollars in Karen’s pocket. 

The time went fast, soon Kenny was hearing the adorable giggling and singing as black ankle boots skipped against the tiled floor.

“Ken!” he leaped into the blonde’s arms.

“Woah!” Kenny stumbled clutching at the boy for dear life. He steadied him on his feet. “Hey there Buttercup, glad to see you too, how was my baby’s day?” Kenny suddenly cared less about scanning the grumpy old man’s products and more about Butters flashing that ultra bright smile that rivaled even the bright star. Okay, Ken was a sappy piece of shit. But, think about this: could you really blame him? It was Butters, Butters, he could be excused. 

The way the tiny blonde gushed about his day was all too endearing and how he was always so cheerful and bright always helped to make Kennt feel better whenever he was down. The taller just nonchalantly finished his work as Butters stayed by his side chatting away. Kenny clocked out and they got in the car, a small light blue Volkswagen Beetle with a Hello Kitty themed steering wheel. Yes, Butters is a basic teenage white girl, but he embraces it and doesn’t try and hide it. 

“‘Nd s-so, I was telling Red that you can totally see Henrietta’s panties—did you hear that skank slept with Annie’s boyfriend on purpose! Like, isn't that just absolutely two-faced.” Kenny nodded his head. He could care less a kid the lot of them he more found the way Butters’ dress hugged his waist. Ever since they got older and Butters came out of his shell and dressed how he wanted, he grew close with the girls of South Park. Often times Kenny would lose his partner for a “Girl’s night-out” event. “Anyway!” Butters’ over enthusiastic voice cut through Kenny’s wandering thoughts to announce his big news. “Guess who's got the solo at the community dance recital out of everyone in my class?!” Butters bit his lip throwing side glances every once and while.

“Uhhh….Bebe?” Kenny teased earning a light barely felt slap to his bicep. “No kidding, babe, I knew you could do it. No one beats my multi talented…er...special person….” Kenny felt weird he knew there was a word playing on the edge of his lips begging to be released. An aching he never felt around anyone else, and it scared him. It was something that he had no idea how to feel about, or what to do about it. So, he chose to ignore it. It seemed to be the best option with the least about of possible damage. It worked, and he would continue to handle it this way until it stopped working. Then, he would be completely and royally fucked. But, that was a problem for another day.

Thankfully, Butters understood what he meant and just smiled all the same. The car parked and Kenny finally drew his attention away from the shining boy driving to see that they were parked outside of Butters’ dance studio where he works. He turned back to see the Hawaiian’s usual innocent dopey smile turn more devious and cunning. 

“Wanna help me practice?” but that only lasted a moment as he was soon back to rubbing knuckles and worrying his bottom lip. Kenny reached over gently cupping his face and gave the toothiest grin he could muster. Using the pad of his thumb he swiped over the bottom lip which was abused so roughly, releasing it. 

“I’d love to.”

 

The music started.

A soft classical sounding beat playing from the speakers. Kenny sat, legs criss cross and mouth hung ajar as he watched his special person pose. The cue cane and Butters steadily brought his head up. He made eye contact and then outstretched his arm, gracefully his hands and legs poised till he started to execute his spins.

Kenny didn't know much about dance outside of shimmies, but he learned from all the technical words Butters would use whenever he would come to watch Karen’s dance lessons (Butters so kindly offered for her to take for free). The ball-step change, the jazz squares, the plies, and overall just the way he swayed his hips in time with the music. It was all so mesmerizing. 

Butters kept a very ethereal expression; very far from his usual cute ol’ Butters. Though, Kenny definitely does not mind this at all...in fact with all due respect of how serious he pursues this career and how proud Kenny is that he got over his fear; it was hot. 

Butters always had a good bodyline but, the spandex tight practice gear all but left Kenny to his imagination. There was a leap, a grand plié, a developpe, and then Butters was spinning across the floor. His leg went up in a inhumanly possible way and Kenny tilted his head sideways. “Damn, you're flexible,” he thought aloud. Butters just smiled and continued on with the routine. He lit up the room which every section he went to never forgetting to lock eyes with the blonde sitting on the floor. He captured his attention, turning Kenny nearly immobile as stared him down. When the music started to fade out, Kenny’s claps crescendoed till he was on his feet and running to grab a panting Butters who was holding his final position. 

“You were just down right amazing!” he exclaimed picking up the lithe boy and peppering kisses like a proud mom. He was proud, Butters, like Tweek, was self conscious about his talents and after the traumatic experience he went through, dancing seemed so far away. But, after much persistence from Kenny, Butters pursued his dream. Here he was, on his way to owning his own dance studio, making dance tutorials on YouTube and gaining followers faster than Jesus (the saint savor only has about 78 thousand, Butters has and whopping 10 million!). 

“Hehe, thanks, Ken!” Butters attempted to speak through his short puffs of air. The routine called for a lot of movement and he was extremely tired already. He worried if he could really pull it off come time for the actual performance, but he knew if Kenny was there cheering him on he could do anything. He wrapped his arms around his neck and let Kenny embraced him while pressing his face into the soft patch of hair on top of his head. But Kenny could still feel his uncertainty.

Pulling away, Kenny did something Kenny’s don't normally do. A thing so soft and tender and just simply gay that the parka wearing boy never could have imagined himself doing it before. Gently palming Butters face he brought him in for a kiss that tasted like candy and syrup. They both smiled into the kiss before Butters broke into a fit of giggles. 

“Okay, okay, I get it already! Geez!” Butters swatted him away and turned to grab his things to go change. 

“By the way, Token wants you to make that dip Craig loves so much….” Kenny trailed behind him. 

“Oh! I definitely have’ ta’ make it!” the dancer chuckled as he remembered the time Craig got so messed up he wanted to marry the bowl of salsa and Tweek got to jealous he threw it down the garbage disposal so they had to have a funeral all in one night! “Yeah, de-definitely making that again.” Butters started to change out of his practice clothes and back into his dress, he would shower when he got home. Showering here would only cause problems, like he knew Kennt wanted to join him and unfortunately that's the only room that's not soundproof. 

In the midst of Kenny’s perving on a unsuspecting Butters he heard the familiar jingle tune of Butters’ notification. In their relationship, checking each other's phones was normal, they had nothing to hide from each other. Kenny picked up the pink bedazzled phone (courtesy of Bebe and Wendy) expecting to see some Facebook selfie like or a game notarizing that Butters hadn't played today or something of the like. Not this. Not this, this, this utter betrayal. Kenny could feel his heart sink to the floor. His legs went numb following his fingers. He had no control and put in the password opening up the message.

Bigdick69: hey baby do you wanna meet up 2nite? 

Kenny broke into a cold sweat. What was Butters doing on tinder? Why did he swipe right? Had he been with other people? What was Kenny to him? What was Butters to Kenny? Maybe they didn’t have anything at all and it was all in his head? No, that couldn’t be true. They had something. Something without a name or a title. But goddamnit, it was something! Besides, who had the name ‘bigdick69’ without it being ironic. His dick was probably a microdick, he was overcompensating. Obviously. That was the only reasonable explanation and there are no biased opinions. 

Kenny felt his stomach do flips. He knew it was hypocritical, he knew he was wrong to try and control Butters’ life. But didn't he have that right, he was his…..special person after all.

Right then, Jimmy’s words of wisdom replayed in his head. 

Treat him right, you don't want him being taken away by someone who will. 

“Butters.” Kenny voice was cold and distant and immediately grabbed Butters’ attention. The small blonde was still half dressed as he made his way over to the taller. 

“Y-yea?” Kenny willed himself not to look into those scared blue eyes because he knew for a fact if he did he wouldn't be able to go through with this.

“Who is this?” Kenny shoves the phone into Butters’ face. Butters reels his head back before squinting his eyes to read the words being shown. He smiled after a minute and that made something in Kenny stir violently. Was this all a joke to him? 

“Okay, there's a perfect explanation to this-” 

“What? That you're a whore?” Kenny blurred out. The immediate regret he felt was too great. He never fought with Butters and he never thought this was about the boy. It was just he was so angry. He didn’t even have the right to be mad at anyone else for sleeping around. He was Kenny McWhoremick, he’s slept with everyone twice. But, he couldn’t stop himself. Even if it was hypocritical of him. 

“Excuse me?” Kenny winced. His voice was full of hurt and Kenny didn't like it. But he couldn't stop.

“I mean, if I'd known you were such a loose slut I wouldn't have slept in the bed with you when you have lots of dick right outside your door.” 

“Ken, you're being-”

“Ridiculous? Over thinking?”

“You're b-be-being a-an asshole!” 

Kenny paused. He finally turned to see Butters in full on tears. His anger dissipated into sorrow. He reached out to grab him but was quickly rejected and Butters stepped away. His heart felt like it could shatter into a million pieces. 

“You don't even listen to me! You don't care about my feelings! Ever since I was a child, I've always loved you….even when you barely knew I existed.” big fat tears rolled down his reddening cheeks. “I've always been patient with your free lifestyle! But when you finally became mine….you weren't….you still want to be free and I was okay with that as long as you looked at me like that…” Butters sighed wiping the tears away. He closed his eyes to calm down, he shouldn't let Kenny see him act like this. He opened them after a moment. A very angry expression on his face. “My best friend, Bradley, you know the one that tried to kill himself because he was gay? Well, he wanted to try it out. But he couldn't let his parents see as they still disapprove of his lifestyle. So, I let him use my phone. If you go to profile you'll see his picture.”

Kenny did as he suggested and it was true. Instead of pastel blonde hair it was more sandy instead of light blue eyes it was brown. The poor boy looked up at Butters with a pleading face. 

“Don't say anything. If you can't trust me, then what are we doing? Who am I to you Ken? Huh? Because even though I've been faithful for whatever we have going on it's not set in stone. How do I know you're not out fucking other people before you have sex with me?” Kenny sputtered. He wasn't doing that, he was completely celibate if it wasn't with Butters no matter how much it killed him. Butters was too special. But now he was super pissed and it was all Kenny’s fault. “Give me my phone.” Kenny handed it over gently. Butter clicked his tongue and stepped back. “Answer the question Kenneth.” Kenny shuddered a bit. Butters never called him by his full name unless he was really mad. 

“You...you're my….I just lo….my um….myyyy” Kenny struggled. He shuffled a bit looking at the ground nervously glancing back up to Butters who had folded arms and deeply furrowed eyebrows. “My special person…”

“Wrong answer, Kenneth. Don't bother coming over. You should probably go to your house. Kyle will pick you up on his way back from class….” Butter threw his dress on and grabbed his bags. He struggled out the door but refused all help from the other. He turned around slightly twisting his body just so Kenny could see the hurt in his face. “I think it's time we take a break from….whatever we might be.” and then he left. Leaving Kenny to pick up the pieces of his heart scattered all over the place and to think about the grave mistake he made. 

Fuck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You finished and you survived, what a miracle! I'm so proud of you! Really, your existence is not impossible but it's also not very likely. However, you exist and you're reading this literary work. What a world it is.- AsexualBasilisk
> 
> Duuuuudddeeee It was like a wild week lots of family things going on and the fact that we were both out of town...ugh...we'll I hope you liked this chapter I tried :} -Kwiyomiboo

**Author's Note:**

> You're welcome if you liked it.  
> I'm sorry if you didn't like it.  
> Thank you for looking at this with your own two eyes, it means a lot to me in this dark void known as my soul.


End file.
